Graduation Time

It’s that time of the year. Almost every day another invitation comes from someone graduating from high school or college. Nieces, neighbors, and friends are letting us know that they have finally made it across the finish line. I wish I had time to sit down and write every one who has sent me an invitation but I can’t do that. But there are some things I still would like to say to the graduates.

Get a life. I don’t particularly like that expression—because you already have a life. As you graduate a door closes but another very heavy door opens. And when that door opens you will find a vast array of choices. Remember the old story of the two boys that went to see the old man everyone said was very wise. They knocked on his door and he answered. They said, “Old man, we have a bird in our hands—is it alive or dead.” They had him either way. If he said it was alive—they would squeeze it to death. If he said it was dead, they would open their hands and let the bird fly away. They old man said, “It’s whatever you want it to be.” The future really is in your hands. What do you want it to be?

Every battle is not Armageddon. Armageddon in the Bible was a big whoop. The battle of all battles. You don’t haul out your big artillery for every fight. You must choose your battles. Some are worth fighting—sometimes you just need to walk away. Don’t overreact. Take the long view—day after tomorrow that crisis back there may not look quite as important as it did yesterday.

What happens in Vegas never stays in Vegas. That’s about as dumb an idea as we have floating around today. The ripples you make in the stream go on and on. Everything is connected. There is no place to hide. If you break it—you own it.

God don’t make no junk. There is so much around us that tells us we don’t matter--that we’re not important. Forget it. Every person has infinite worth. That’s why I love the song: “This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine…” We really can do that. Light your candle—it will make a difference. Yo-Yo Mah once told a young man just learning to play the cello, “Nobody else can make the sound you make.” It was a compliment. Everyone is unique.

Say thank-you. I know your Mama used to say this a hundred times a week. But it’s true. To be grateful is a wonderful trait. Nobody likes an ingrate. Did you know that the root word thank and think come from the same source? If you stop and think you will walk through your life a grateful person—and you will bless those around you.

Put screens on your windows. Don’t believe everything you hear. The average American watches 24 hours of TV a week. That’s four hours a day. Get up out of your chair. Change the channel. Or even better turn off the set and pick up a book—or anything that will give you another point of view. Without screens the woolliest things fly through your windows.

Don’t be afraid to fail. It goes with the territory. The only people who do not fail are the people who do nothing. You are going to fail--I guarantee you. But what happens when you get up and dust yourself off is the telling point. I think I have learned more from my failings than I ever did from my successes. Winston Churchill was asked once after World War II what was the most important thing he told the British people as the bombs fell. He said, “Never, never, never give up.” What happens after failure is the acid test.

People who need people really are the luckiest people. The relational side of life is the most important part of any of our lives. Mr. Rogers of Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood used to say, “Anyone who has ever been able to sustain good work has had at least one person who believed in him or her.” We really do rely on one another to make it down the road.

Color outside the lines. Take risks. Be bold. Allow yourself room for what you cannot see or hear or touch or control. The great artists know this. You will be surprised at what you learn or do.

The greatest of these is hope. Frederick Buechner, the writer has said if Paul were writing today he would say: “The great of these is hope—not love.” Why? Because without hope we’re not going to make it to the finish line. Keep working on hope and it will pay off great rewards.

Dr. Seuss wrote this great book that is as hopeful as anything I know. He calls it, Oh, the Places You Will Go. It’s a wonderful idea about life as a journey with ups and downs and scary places and wonderful times. And that is my wish for you as a graduate. That you will open that new door and stand back and look in wonder and proceed with all you’ve got.

(The above article appeared in the Viewpoints section of The Birmingham News, 5-24-09 under the title, Get a Life.)