Judy Bridgers: I Will Remember Her Always

"I'll be loving you always--

not for just a day, not for just a year--

but always..."

Judy slipped away from us.… It is altogether appropriate for her to leave us at Christmastime. Judy cerebrated Christmas every day!  I don’t know anyone who loved life and parties and people and entertaining and laughter anymore than Judy Bridgers.

Judy was an unframed original. I’m trying to remember when I first met her. I was Pastor in Birmingham and she began to visit our church. Not being a Baptist I think from the first she was a little wary about “the Baptists."We had been through the Gay-acceptance fight and that wonderful church stood up to the challenge. Whew! Hard struggle. But the church came out on the right side. So when she heard about this little church that opened its doors to everyone she came to check us out. She must have liked what she saw because one Sunday she walked down the aisle and joined this Baptist church. Those were hard days. It was the time when the AIDS crisis was raging and we had a lot of funerals. People were scared that they might catch this disease.

Judy and her husband Bill, who was the founding Dean of the UAB School of Public Health, were both were champions for the people with AIDS—and all gay people.  A UAB doctor, Dr. Michael Saag got interested in the AIDS challenge and became one of the international spokespersons in helping to deal with the medical crisis. We would not be where we are in having saved so many lives if it had not been for this good doctor and the work that both these Bridgers did.*

So our journey of friendship began. The Church began to take Meals on Wheels to very sick Gay folk. And gay people heard about the church and they began to trickle in and join and become a vital part of that congregation. And Judy loved the effort and supported it—and told everybody about what were were trying to do—to just accept everybody—no restrictions. One Sunday Judy brought a visiting Episcopal minister to church with her. He looked around and said, “There’s no way this group of diverse people can stay together.” But we did. And they still do.  And Judy Bridgers in her quiet way—helped make that happen.

Judy was a cook extraordinaire.  Every Monday night for I don’t know how many years she had open house—I mean open. For dinner! And I’m not talking about pinto beans and cornbread. It would be a spread—and the house—which was beautiful anyway—always looked festive for those dinners. A whole bunch a gay guys were there every Monday night. Many would not have missed it for they knew when they walked into the door of that house in Birmingham they would find acceptance and love. Bill and Judy both made sure that would happen.

Judy knew many gay people and she was fiercely in their corner. And she became surrogate Mama and counselor and friend too so many. Some of those guys were turned away from their homes when the families found out they were gay. Some had a lot of problems—but never mind—Judy opened the door and her heart to them all.

She was one of the best cooks I have ever known. She often made me Pimento Cheese and I called it: “the Judy Bridgers Memorial Pimento Cheese.” On Monday nights she would spread out all that delicious food on her big dining room table ands we would have feast after feast.

She was from Selma and never let anyone forget it. Deeply, deeply Southern—she had all the good graces that Southerners can possess—and not many of our faults. Well, maybe some. 

After her husband, Bill died Judy continued to love and care for so many. She moved from her big house in Mountain Brook to a fine condo in downtown Birmingham. And when my wife and I moved away—Judy made sure when we came back that there would be a dinner in our honor and she would invite some of our favorite people.

I still remember the day Bill died I was there and she and I walked into his hospital room which was quiet and sad. Bill lay there and Judy said her goodbyes. They loved each other fiercely and that passing was hard, very hard.

How strange it seems that when I go back to Birmingham that Judy will not be there.  To Jana and family I simply say: You will miss her always. But how fortunate that she was your Mama. And though the days ahead will be hard indeed for Jana and all those of us that she loved—our lives are better, stronger and maybe more faith-full too, because of Judy Bridgers. 

"Into paradise may the angels lead

dear Judy, any her coming

may the martyrs take her up

into eternal rest,

and may the chorus of angels

lead her to that holy city,

and the place of perpetual light."

--from the Roman Catholic Prayer for there Dead

(These two photos I think express much of who Judy was. She loved her boys...and my, my there were many, so very many whose lives will be forever different because of Judy.)

*Bill and Judy Bridgers Endowed Scholarship:

The Bill and Judy Bridgers Endowed Scholarship was created to honor Dr. William (Bill) Bridgers and his wife Judy for their outstanding service and commitment to public health.  Bill was the driving force behind establishing the UAB School of Public Health and served as its founding dean.  He devoted his career to improving the lives of all Alabamians and his work on the front lines of health care helped to combat emerging infectious diseases, to make workplaces safer, and to protect the health of the most vulnerable in our society.  Judy has demonstrated her strong support of public health issues through her active and tireless volunteer efforts for a variety of health causes, especially the fight against AIDS.

--Roger Lovette/ rogerlovette.blogspot.com